People like others whom they are like. So if you want to make a flawless first impression, it is your duty to discover what you have in common with every person you talk to. The 6 Essential Elements for Flawless First Impressions are part of Scott Ginsberg's the UNFORGETTABLE! Audio System. Let Me Ask Ya This
Several months ago my friend Mitch and I were introduced to a small group of people through which we had a mutual friend. I wanted to be sure our conversation was engaging, so I offered one of my favorite questions to ask new people: "What's your favorite cereal?" As usual, Mitch and I got a mild chuckle from the group, but eventually everyone contributed. We then talked for twenty minutes about cereal, in-box prizes and various childhood memories related to breakfast foods. What a great conversation! At the end of the night, Mitch and I said goodbye to our new friends. On the way out, they actually thanked us for our interesting conversation about cereal! Fast forward... A few weeks later I ran into Anne, one of the girls from the table I met that night. She jumped out of her seat and gave me a hearty greeting! "Hey nice to see you again Scott! My friends and I still talk about how enjoyable our cereal conversation was with you and Mitch. We'll never forget that!" This reveals the first key to Locating the CPI: asking engaging, open ended questions. In other words, questions that don't elicit a yes or no answer or a monosyllabic conversation killer like F.I.N.E or ehh. When you meet someone for the first time, pose questions that begin with Whats your favorite? How long have you been? and How did you get started? Questions like these build rapport, spark creativity and invite people to share experiences and preferences. Whats more, they show interest in peoples opinions and insights. TIP #1: What people LIKE is just as important as what they ARE LIKE. Blank Blank Blank
Another way to Locate the CPI is with compliments. If you want to be unforgettable in your first impressions, giving a compliment and doing so effectively is a fail safe method. Now, Im not talking about cheap flattery. There is a right and wrong way to do this. If someone came up to you and said, Hey, uhyoure cute! or You smell good, would you feel flattered? Would you feel like they took an interest in you? Probably not. Stuff like this just shows that someone is looking for an easy out, or an easy in. But theres a way to structure a compliment thats simple and effective. I like to call it The Blank Blank Blank Theory. Compliments have to be specific or else they dont sound heartfelt. So, according to the formula, you say: I (blank) your (blank) because (blank). For example: I like that watch its very classy. Whered you get it? (Notice I added an open ended question at the end of the compliment.) Specifically when you compliment things, asking people where they got something is a great way to get a story or some background information. How many times have you asked someone this question who answered with When I was on vacation? That always generates a synchronized, detailed conversation especially if youve been to some of the same places they have. TIP #2: Its all about going from HOW are you to WHO are you. The Sweetest Sound
The last tool that will help you Locate the CPI is an inquiry about a persons name. In addition to the importance of identifying, amplifying and remembering a persons name, asking about the name itself will make you UNFORGETTABLE every time. Have you ever had a conversation that begun about someones name, but continued about their name for a few minutes? Its great when this happens! And you can be certain the other person is enjoying the conversation because its all about them. So the CPI is: them! Once after giving a speech, a member of the audience approached me and introduced herself as Hannah. To find out if it was a palindrome, I asked her about the spelling. When she handed me her card, immediately her name struck a chord in me. One of my favorite books as a child was called Hannah Is a Palindrome. This book was about a young girl in third grade named Hannah. One day her classmates started to make fun of her because the teacher told the class that Hannah was a palindrome. Ha ha! Hannah is a palindrome, Hannah is a palindrome! Nah, nah, n-na nya! But when the teacher explained to her students that palindrome meant a word that could be spelled forward and backwards, a long ooooh came over the students. After that, everyone loved Hannah and all the kids were envious of her special name. This was the story I told to Hannah, the audience member. To my surprise, shed read the book before! We talked all about nicknames, palindromes, childrens books and more! Simply because the conversation revolved around one thing: her name. TIP #3: Dont just use someones name inquire about someones name. How Are You Similar?
An essential element for flawless first impressions is helping other person realize how similar they are to you. You accomplish this goal by locating the CPI (common point of interest). With the combination of open ended questions, compliments and conversations that focus on them as the topic of discussion, you will be certain to be UNFORGETTABLE! |
