A woman recently asked me how to tell if a man qualifies as Mr. Right. "He says I'm the only one for him," she announced, "but you know how men are. They all lie." But all men do not lie. Sure, I've dated a liar or two (one of whom was clearly pathological), but it's wrong to assume that every human who possesses a Y chromosome is compelled to fib. It's like saying every woman wants to see multiple zeros on a guy's W-2 Form before she'll accept a marriage proposal. It's just not true. But if you continually find yourself in relationships with men who fudge the truth, ask yourself if you are somehow justifying the truth-fudging. If you believe in your heart of hearts that all men lie (or cheat, or refuse to clean up after themselves, and so on), you will not only tend to let them get away with it, you're actually likely to attract that behavior. Mr. Right is never a liar! Insist that the men you date be honest. If you find yourself involved with a fellow who falls short of the mark, you have two choices: Avoid further disappointment by breaking it off with him immediately. Or you can tell the Pinnochio, "Look, I don't lie, and I don't have time for people who do. If tell me anything less than the truth ever again, we're finished." Then keep your promise. Remember what Somerset Maugham once said: "It's a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it." |
