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Index Page » Lifestyle & Fashion » Marriages
 

Who Needs the Marriage Certificate?

 

There are couples who set up a home, have children, and are husband and wife in every way, except one. They havent taken the final step of making their commitment a legal one. As they will explain to anyone who wants to know, they see no necessity for this. Their commitment to each other is genuine enough without the piece of paper.

But one might argue, if that piece of paper is so unimportant, why do they avoid it so much?

In 1846, Herman Melville wrote a novel about a tribe called the Typees, that suggests a parallel. A man is shipwrecked and finds himself among a savage tribe of natives who turn out to be cannibals in fact. It takes him a while to get used to them. But the more he stays with them, the more he is attracted by their essential honesty, innocence and integrity. No Typee needs ever fear of starving to death while another Typee has a crumb he can share. So unlike the civilized, and in particular, industrialized, world from where the hero comes.

He is genuinely impressed with this society. So much so, that he feels he would be quite happy to be part of it.

However, to be one of them, there is one custom of theirs that he must embrace. For the Typees, it is customary to have themselves tattooed. In many cases the tattoos are so extensive that they practically obliterate every available piece of skin. There is no way to mistake a Typee once you see him.

Tommo, our hero, while admiring the honesty, the genuiness, the generosity of these people, finds himself balking at the idea that they might place a tattoo on him and thus brand him for ever a Typee.

It is at this moment that the reader realizes that though Tommo is articulating the idea of how wonderful it is to live among these essentially good people, he doesnt really want to take that irrevocable step that will make him one of them.

It is one thing to admire the Typee people, toy with the idea of living in the innocence of their society, to even articulate the higher level of morality which this society has, but what if he ever has the opportunity to return? The tattoo will never let him be what he once was.

One wonders whether that Marriage Certificate, really nothing in itself, has a sense of irrevocability that frightens many couples from taking that last step. A legal marriage.

Author: Vlady Peters
 
Author Bio:

Vlady Peters

Vlady Peters is an Australian Civil Marriage Celebrant performing weddings, naming, renenewal of vows and commitment ceremonies both for Australian citizens and for overseas couples visiting friends and relatives in Australia.

She is the author of two traditionally published books, "The Complete Book of Australian Weddings" and "The Small Organisation Handbbook" and is in the process of releasing two ebooks dealing with weddings and honeymoons.

Her major interest is research into customs and traditions of weddings.

By going back to the roots of customs, she believes couples can more clearly differentiate between what is essential in a wedding ceremony, and what is merely a personal preference.

This allows them to choose a ceremony reflecting their own situation within the framework of legal requirements.

Vlady has a bachelor of Arts in English Literature and Government, and has studied the writing of novels and romances. She has written children picture books as well as novels.

She is a member of Queesland Civil Marriage Celebrants - the largest Civil Marriage Celebrants Association in Australia - as well as member of Celebrants' Training Association.

She is also a member of Australian Authors, as well as Romance Writers Association where for a number of years she was the Convenor of the prestigious Emma Darcy Award - Australia's leading Lady of Romance.

 
 
 

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